and just like that ✨
sweater weather is upon us but this newsletter is not about sweaters 🍂
The other day, 2 people told me that my glow is back. I’m glad to hear that. This year, the summer season barely registered because it passed by in a haze of shock and heartache. I know what I was feeling, and it was a LOT. Who knows what people were seeing? At any rate, it’s so nice to be crawling out of the dark, not just from the past few months, but from a very, very long time ago as well.1
Healing is a weird thing. Everyone says it’s 2 steps forward, 1 step back. But what about being mad that I’m put in the position to need to heal? What is dealing with that emotion? I guess it’s actually part of the process. But…how do you even know when you’ve healed? Do you ever heal fully? How healed does someone have to be before she’s ready to ‘get back on that horse, girl!’ (s/o Summer Roberts, IYKYK.)
This year I learned so much that I didn’t know I never wanted to learn.2 But I also learned things that had been hidden in me for a long time. At first, the intensity of it scared me. But (I think) I’ve gotten control of that side of me—but not so much that I will suppress it again.
Healing is not a linear thing. It’s slow and messy. It means beautiful, bright days where I’m dancing and singing. It means quieter days where I journal and reflect. But most importantly, it means clarity and peace. Closure. Now, I don’t think I’ll wake up one day and say, “I declare! I am healed!”3 But I am happy to be waking up every day feeling lighter, more peaceful, and more like me, whoever she is.4
♡ and just like that
In Chicago, autumn descended upon us slowly, and then all at once.5 We went from using AC one day to the radiator kicking on the next. The furnace here is disturbingly loud when it turns on. It sounds like someone is hitting it with a very large hammer and the clanking reverberates throughout the entire building.
It makes me think about how every person we meet irrevocably changes us in some way. It could be a small change from a significant encounter, or it could a remarkable change from a quick chat with a stranger. It could be from someone who has been in one’s life for as long as they’ve been alive, or it could be someone you pass on the street but you make eye contact and do the “I see you” nod. One meeting can change the course of someone’s entire life while a conversation could shatter someone else’s. Our effects are reverberating in some way throughout so many people’s lives, whether they remember it or not. Whether we realize it or not. And to take it further, people we’ve never met but who met people we know can alter the course of a life drastically. And that sort of thing kind of blows my mind.6
This month is always weird for me. Mother Nature shows up and shows out with her big, blue sky and brilliant foliage. I can’t get enough of the fiery reds, golden yellows, and vibrant oranges that decorate the canopy of trees outside. But as October closes, as the sky grows more grey, as the bite in the air gets sharper, and as those beautiful leaves are raked into crunchy piles, I grow melancholy and reflective. I freak out about my mortality. I wrestle with the days going by, the feeling of running out of time. I replay conversations, argue with people under my breath, smile at good memories and when I think of certain people. Scowl when I think of others.
So, sometimes when that furnace clangs and makes us all warm and cozy, I think about all the things that got me here.7 The people who got me to this place in my life—no matter how short or long their time was with me. The good and the bad. (I don’t like thinking about the bad.) The easy and the hard. (More ease, please.) Just life.
I have a lot to reflect on this year.
♡ in writing news
My cat Priya is very skittish. Loud noises and sudden movements scare her. Strangers terrify her. Sometimes she’ll be sitting and looking beautiful. I will want to pet her, but I know if I move too quickly, she’ll dart away. So I have to approach her slowly, offer her my hand, let her sniff it before she will let me pet her. Sometimes she does, sometimes she still runs away.
That’s how my fiction mojo is being. I see it there, shining and sparkling, and while I want to scoop it up and hold it close, I know that if I try to force it, it’ll blink back to where it is hiding. So I will proceed with caution. I don’t want to lose it again.
I’m excited for when I’m 100% back and better than ever.
♡ right now
Reading: The Academy by Elin Hilderbrand and Shelby Cunningham
Listening: K-Pop Demon Hunters soundtrack, assorted Charli XCX songs
Playing: Fields of Mistria, Animal Crossing New Horizons, The Sims 4
What are you into these days?
♡ come meet me
Here’s where I’ll be over the coming months:
Book Signing with Miranda Sun and Anna Sortino at Barnes & Noble Wicker Park | Saturday, October 18, 2025 | 1 p.m. – 3 p.m.
Signing and panels at The Booked Eau Claire Convention | September 18–19, 2026 | more info TBD!
♡ connect with me
Please feel free to follow me on any or all of the social media platforms listed here:
instagram • threads • pinterest • bluesky
♡ final thoughts
Buy This Night Is Ours!!!
It would be absolutely awesome if you request my books at your local library. Libraries are some of my favorite places, and I love when I discover my book in one.
Thank you thank you for sticking around until the end! If you enjoyed, I hope you consider sharing with a friend. Sending you love and light ✨
I only wish I’d started this journey wayyyy sooner—I’m talking decades sooner. 🥺
This is not a typo. I never wanted to learn most of the stuff I learned, but alas. Here I am.
Although I wouldn’t mind it. In fact, it would be pretty terrific!
I’m still learning, to be honest. I’m liking what I’m uncovering, though!
This is paraphrasing a line from John Green’s The Fault In Our Stars. I just think this is a beautiful way to describe so many things.
And not always in a good way! Some of those ripples really suck and will for a long time.
Unless it’s happening at 2 a.m. That’s when I’m thinking “Is it necessary to make all that noise, Mr. Furnace?”
You look beautiful! Glad you’re doing okay and having a reflective fall. And I’m also still playing ACNH! We should visit each other’s islands sometime ❤️